Friday, December 30, 2016

Just an Adventure

I walked for around three and a half hours today. I started around 4 pm and got home around 7:30 pm. My route was Home-Mamay Road-Roseville Subdivision-Angliongto-Lanang-FlyOver-Bubangin-St. Mary's Parish (SMP)-Jehova's Witness Assembly-Home. You have to be from Davao City, Philippines to know what I mean.

The view was amazing in Mamay. Along the way, I got to pet puppies. They looked like golden retrievers. One was brown and the other was white. Their mom went out and she didn't seem to be a retriever after all. The puppies just looked like it because they were well-fed. I saw the owner too, a woman. She seemed nice. There was also a big red chicken there. I didn't know they would get that big. Lots of other animals were there. Beside where they lived, there was a guy shoveling some sand. I continued walking after petting them. There was a guy who looked homeless but his clothes were neat. He wore a basketball jersey and white pants. He carried a flute recorder. He has a phone. The model was MyPhone and the color was black. It was the type that has TV. I still walked.

When I saw the sign for Roseville I thought I should lurk around there. I thought that because I knew my high school classmate lives there. I didn't really want to see him. I just wanted to kill some time. I was really bored. All I could remember there was a lady on a motorcycle with a guy asking me where the Christmas Mansion was. I didn't know because I wasn't from there.

I got out of Roseville and it seemed like I reached Damosa. One of the reasons that I went out for a walk was to buy a nipper from a 7Eleven store. There was one there, but sadly, there weren't any nippers. So I continued on. I reached SM Lanang. I thought of entering the mall and just buy the nipper there. I could also check out my friend having her on-the-job training there and tease her. Haha. But I thought, nah and continued walking. As I walked, the homeless guy who I saw earlier was waving at me from across the street. I waved back. I didn't think he would cross the street and join me on my walk.

We walked together. The sun was already gone and it started to drizzle. We headed for shelter. We talked. I noticed there were tattoos on his face. The tatts looked loked scribbles. There was a straight line and  there was another with a loop. I don't remember all the features. He said he was looking for some fun and just carolled today. He wants me to join him, to carol together. I declined. I asked him personal questions like where he lived, his age, his family. He said he was from R. Castillo, but is currently living in, wait, I forgot, dammit. Anyway, he said he's 30 years old and that he got into drugs. His family got him rehabilitated. When he returned home after rehabilation, their house and his family-his parents and siblings- were no longer there. He was in rehab from 1990-2000. I really tried deciphering him. I kept asking him questions, like if he stopped school, he just kept nodding. I don't think he even knows what I'm saying. He was really inconsistent with his answers. Here's what I got from asking questions and him saying yeses and nos: he stopped high school and got into drugs. The drugs he took was syrup bought from pharmacies. He said he was thirty years old. But if he really was in rehab in 1990 and was in high school by then, he must be around forty by now. He looked old for being thirty. I just believed thirty because of the drug thing but he could've been more than forty. Okay, I kept stepping back as we talked because he keeps on trying to put his arm around my shoulder and his hand on my back. Good thing I'm smart. He just really wants someone to be with. I really wanted to help him with his life. I suggested he would seek help from city hall and find a job, that Duterte will help him. He said no. He didn't want to got there because they would imprison him. We continued to walk even in the drizzle. I didn't mind. I put my hands in my hoodie's pockets in case he would grab them.

Get this, he wants to come with me back home. I was like whut? He just said that I would just tell mom that he's my husband, and he'll own me as his wife. This guy was really nuts if he believed my mom will buy that. He's too far gone. I don't know what to do with him. Anyway, we continued walkong. He wondered if I had any problems because my face looked problematic. I said I didn't had any. I just didn't like walking with him. He said I shouldn't be afraid of the people around and I said I was just afraid of him. I don't think he heard me say that.

Along the way, he bought cola, offered me some, I refused, he drank, and bought two cigarettes by the overpass near SPMC, and we walked again. We already passed by two 7Elevens when we got to Buhangin. It was a long walk. He wanted to rest. (pfft. Weak.) He sat by a parking space by 7Eleven. We hung out silently. I really wanted to ditch this guy. I was afraid he might follow me home. I said I should go ahead now because I still have somewhere to go. He kept asking me where I live. I just shook my head. I said to him he should just go on carolling without me. I somehow convinced him to go our separate ways and we high-fived goodbye. Phew. That was close. I headed on, walking to the other 7Eleven store in Buhangin.

When I got there, they still didn't have any nippers. So I just bought 2 packs of tissues instead. I bought the nipper from the cheap store that lines along the street. When I headed home, my companions from SMP rondalla who just finished carolling saw me. I was supposed to be with them today but I overslept and I didn't actually want to join them. I jokingly overed my head with the hoodie I was wearing and walked away fast. I still greeted them though so I wouldn't seem like that type of person who ignores firends.

I reached home after that. I ate and now I'm typing this here. I just want to remember this adventure. Just another story to tell. But not really. I'll just tell it here. Not to anyone.

Just Some Update

I actually feel better now. I'm not thinking of that guy as much as before anymore. I really hate it when hormones just burst out all at once like that making me feel ugh, I hate to say it, lovesick. I  really hate saying it, or thinking about it. It makes me feel gay. Again, I mean gay as an expression.

Okay I'm chatting with people on Messenger now and it's breaking my flow om this post so I'll just end it here for now.

Wednesday, December 28, 2016

Tuesday, December 27, 2016

Just Boredom Making Me Want to Write Shtuff

You know what? I've been trying to find other things to do to keep myself from thinking of you. I've tried playing my musical instruments but every song I play reminds me of you. I tried resorting to art but as I start staring at the canvas, all I could see is your face. I tried writing stories but all I could think of writing down is your name. I didn't write it down, for your information. It just sucks that every distraction I seek, you keep finding yourself back into my mind. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm afraid of telling you all of this personally. I don't even know what makes me afraid. I have nothing to lose anyway. I guess it's just embarassing, because I am not the type of person who thinks about someone every passing moment. Well, if it is your goal to climb into my prefrontal cortex, stay in my long-term memories, and torture me with thoughts of you, congratulations, you've succeeded.

Monday, December 26, 2016

Just Drunk Again

Time is relative.

I mean, it's different when you're sober and it flies fast when you're a little tipsy.

I know I have a contract with myself from months ago that I will never drink again but this is different. I'm drinking with cousins and relatives not with outsiders.

I know I'm sounding like I'm just making up reasons right now. Yup. It's true. I blame myself. I just thought it would be rude to reject them. But it isn't enough reason to break a contract is it.

Saturday, December 24, 2016

Just How?

My mind was used to be filled by thoughts of death and philosophy but nowadays it is mostly filled with thoughts about you. I don't really like it. It is torture.

Don't get me wrong. I don't like you in a romantic way. I love you because you really seemed to be interested in me when no one else was; love, in a way I love my role models and favorite celebrities.

I just wonder why every song I listen to reminds me of you, why every dull moment I encounter you fill it by appearing in my thoughts. I don't even like the thought of us together.

People say to me that the person I'll marry will be very lucky. They have seen what I can do. I don't want to be boastful here. It was them who said it.

What I want is to just figure out how to stop it, how to stop thinking of you. I really hate it. I hate my brain. Why must it not cooperate with my mind?

Saturday, December 17, 2016

Just an Essay that I Got a 98 for in Our English Requirement: Why Do We Love?

Love is a really complicated subject, for you could mean a lot of things when you say, “I love you.” You could mean “I love you” as a friend, as a brother, or even as a cousin who you would like to have a laugh with when they visit and feel relieved once they leave. But what about when we say “I love you” romantically? What does love have to do with romance? Why do we even perform such a complex thing that manifests a huge mystery that even scientists and philosophers have had a hard time trying to decipher what it is?

C8H11NO2+C10H12N2O+C43H66N12O12S2 ̶ dopamine + serotonin + oxytocin. This is the chemical formula for love. You see, I tend to question why people fall in love. I try to seek out the logical explanation for everything. I search for the science behind why things are the way they are. It turns out, people love because the brain, specifically the pituitary gland, secretes these three hormones that people interpret as love. So, we love because of, as what people have said before, the chemical reactions that are happening in our brain. We cannot control the involuntary organs that do what they want to do. We cannot help it. We cannot fight it. Most people cannot. I try to fight it. Every time when I think I am falling in love, I try to think that it is just infatuation, and it normally is. That is why I am still single until now.

But we are not talking about that right now. We are talking about why we love. Like I said, it is just your gland releasing hormones. Why does our gland secrete hormones? It does that because it is nature. It is in biology and in our anatomy. Cells break down and build themselves up to continue the life cycle. If people have not loved for thousands of years then we would not exist right now. If people have not loved, romance movies would not have existed, plays like Romeo and Juliet would not have been made, poems about heartache and marriage would not have been printed in books and sold in bookstores, Nicholas Sparks novels would not have made it into the world and remade into terrible movies, and you would have not been singing that same old love song for so many times now.

During boring classes, the students get really drowsy and decide to sleep. When the teacher talks about love, all of the drowsiness suddenly fade away. They become snappy. There is something in the subject that captures the attention of people. Maybe like a program that is designed to make us respond when we hear that word. Talking about it makes us feel happy, rewarded and content. Perhaps that is why we love. We love so that we can be happy. We love so we can share our happiness with that special someone. Two people compromise a relationship to perform a symbiosis. Both giving the other a part of themselves, trusting that the other will not take him or her for granted.

Some people prefer not to question why we love. They will say that it is just the way it is. We love because we just do it. Should that not be enough? When two people are in a relationship, one of them may ask, “Why do you love me?” then the other may answer by stating a few features that person may have: “I love you because your smile brightens the world”, “I love you because your eyes remind me of the ocean”, or “I love you because I see so much of myself in you”. One’s reason to love may be is to just reciprocate for being loved: “I love you because you love me”. Some people love because they think it is the appropriate thing to do. Society will judge you if you are unable to love at all. People love, to conform to the norms set by our ancestors a long time ago. It is abnormal if you have the inability to love, because it is love that makes us human. It is what makes us different from animals. We love, because we are designed to do so.

When you first meet a person, you do not know if you will love them in the future. You do not know if they will love you. You do not know if you will even love each other. But as time passes, you will realize that when you stare at his eyes, you will notice the way his lips curve when he smiles, and the way that he can play each note on the guitar so perfectly that it makes you want to smile, too. You will think about him before you sleep, or when you cannot sleep at all, or even in the shower. You will wonder what is happening. And then you will say, “Ah, so this is why we love.”

Thursday, December 15, 2016

Just Why Do You Do This to Me?

You forced yourself to be a part of my life. You hung
   out for a while, and when I
decided to remove you, you have already made
   a permanent mark.




























___________________________________________________________________________


I should explain this. You see, I was doing this task a year ago. I was supposed to cut out big letters with a Gothic font, when someone requested me to cut out a small one of his initial with the sticky paper I have, so I did. The sticky paper was white so he colored it black with a marker. Without permission, he stuck it to my phone case and decided to spread false information that it was me who had a crush on him when in fact it was him who placed it there. I kept it there for a while for some reasons and when I removed the sticky paper, the marker's ink have blotted to the phone case and left a permanent mark of his initial there forever.

Wednesday, December 14, 2016

Just a List of Unfamiliar Words I have Encountered and Their Meaning

confabulator

     confabulate -to fill in gaps in one's memory with fabrications that one believes to be facts

ac·qui·esce
ˌakwēˈes/
verb
  1. accept something reluctantly but without protest.
    "Sara acquiesced in his decision"
fur·tive
ˈfərdiv/
adjective
  1. attempting to avoid notice or attention, typically because of guilt or a belief that discovery would lead to trouble; secretive.
rav·en·ous
ˈrav(ə)nəs/
adjective
  1. extremely hungry.
e·the·re·al
əˈTHirēəl/
adjective
  1. 1.
    extremely delicate and light in a way that seems too perfect for this world.

faux pas
ˌfō ˈpä/
noun
  1. an embarrassing or tactless act or remark in a social situation.
pa·thos
ˈpāˌTHäs/
noun
  1. a quality that evokes pity or sadness.

Sunday, December 11, 2016

Saturday, December 10, 2016

Just a Bruise

I hit this part of my leg on the bed guard a few days ago. It hurt then and it doesn't hurt as much now. I don't get why it wasn't so visible when it was the most painful and it makes great marks when it doesn't hurt anymore.

Bruise

Saturday, December 03, 2016

Just Sayin'





                                                  I'm not okay... I'm schizophrenic.





Wednesday, November 30, 2016

Just Saw This


So I saw my friend retweet this photo on Twitter. My blog is a little black and white too but I don't think this will ever happen. I don't know. We'll see.


Saturday, November 26, 2016

Just...

Deep inside I want to kill myself, but other than that life's good.

Monday, November 21, 2016

Just Charcoal Sketching and Not Finishing

The last time I worked on this it was more than a week ago. I don't have the motivation to finish it anymore because the paper just sucks. Every time I brush and erase it gets creased and woolly. I should just redo this on another paper. Probably Canson or Vellum.



Thursday, November 17, 2016

Wednesday, November 09, 2016

Just Shaking Hands

I can not seem to steady my hands
 The shaking reminds me of what I have done
  Yes, of course, I should deserve this
    To you, it seems, I have every right to deserve this
     but everyone else thinks otherwise

I may tell you what I did
 But promise me you'll keep it a secret
  It is no surprise at all, really
   I just skipped a meal and barely eaten
    And didn't sleep the other night
     That is why my hands are shaking

Monday, November 07, 2016

Just Ranting in My Own Dialect

Kung magreklamo gani ka nga dili tarong ang eskwelahan, sigurado nga tarong pud ka nga studyante. Kung tarong jud ka, edi payts lang. Pero kabalo jud ko nga dili ka tarong kay sige ka'g pangopya sa akong mga answer kada exam tapos okay ra man pud sa ako nga mangopya ka. Ayaw ra jud ko ingna nga nagatarong ka ug skwela. Kay kung tarong ka nagskwela, magstudy ka, dili magsalig sa ako.

Just Something I Wanted So Badly, but Now, I Have It

So I posted previously something that I wanted so badly. Here's the link to that post: http://my-love-like-antimony.blogspot.com/2016/01/just-something-i-want-so-badly.html

And now, someone made me one. Not bought, but made; said it was for my birthday. I gave him a link to my blog before and he scrolled so far to that post. Now I am so thankful I love it so much. I didn't even think he would think of doing that kind of thing for me. We haven't even met. But he did it, and gave it to me personally last Saturday, and I exchanged some of my drawings with him too.

Thank you, Marco ^_^

Skeleton Gerard Way

Sunday, November 06, 2016

Just Some Art I Made Last Week

The male singer from Sleeping with Sirens who has a girlier voice than me, Kellin Quinn. I ripped some paper from my drawing book and got bored so I drew him. Who knew it would turn out like this? Haha. I used a ballpoint pen with this.

Kellin Quin Sketch

I get envious when people upload watercolor art on Facebook so I decided to make one myself. Not that good in it, though. I used bond paper, some cheap watercolor from the streets and used pen for the outlines.


Friday, November 04, 2016

Just Irritation

I heard you say something the first time and I chose to ignore you. Then, you say it again and I tell you that I heard you the first time and now I am annoyed. Ugh

Just A Little Life

This may be the most painful book I have read. It can really make your face look like the cover.

A Little Life

Thursday, November 03, 2016

Just a Post that isn't True to Life

Another airplane passes by. I remember how you wanted to be in one. You wanted to explore other places. You couldn't even stay put in class. When we grew up, you rode ships instead, because along the way, you obtained a fear of heights. Well, maybe just a fear of falling, because ever since you fell for someone, it shattered you to bits, and I watched you as it happened. I didn't do anything about it. I don't regret it, because I knew that you needed this. You needed to know the importance of anchors. They are what stops you from drifting away from the people who love you, stops you from drifting away from me. And for such time, I wonder, would you still be here now if you got on a plane, or still lost at sea? Because when the news about you going overboard for the reason of you couldn't stay still, I keep missing you. I guess you didn't know enough about the importance of anchors, both literally and metaphorically.

But I know you're living your dream now, the dream of being in the sky, looking down upon us.

Just that I Couldn't Sleep, and I Wrote this 2 Hours Ago and Just Uploaded it Now

Here I am, ranting again, about the people I know, who complain a lot, as if they have it the worst, as if they are the only people in the world. "You wouldn't understand," he said. "You don't know my pain," she said. They seek for attention, for help, and once people give them what they want and what they need and what they have been thirsting for, they reward them utter bullshit, as if they are the most important people in the world, completely apathetic. Little do they know they are just whiny babies seeking for the love that was never given to them, so blind with their own vanity, never once put themselves in other people's shoes. I hope they change. I hope it won't forever be this way. I hope I won't complain about people complaining anymore. Because people like me can't take it anymore. It kills us.

Saturday, October 29, 2016

Just a Bisaya Post

12:57 PM

Bah, dili ka angayan. Undangi na please. Puta.

12:58

Sigeg pabebe. Letch. Lamia ba nimo hawaon sa kinabuhi. Kung pwede lang.

1:00

Yeah, it's true. No one cares about you. So shut up you crybaby. Pfft. Pathetic.

1:01

You should go to therapy.

I know you'll never read this and that's good.

1:02

Ing-ana ka tungod sa lalaki? WTF? Seriously? Bah, talk about pathetic.

1:04

Then why don't you do what you want? What's stopping you? I know I'm not the one to talk when I don't know the whole story but I am getting irritated by what you irresponsibly post online.

Just, I Don't Know

Darling,
You don't need those toxic people in your life
The only one who could make you feel better is yourself
We are here to support you but
we can not control how you feel
We are not mentalists who know how to mind-control
As much as we want to help you,
we can not help you if you will not help yourself

Just Sick of Pathetic People

If you need help, don't seek for attention by posting on social media. Tell your family and friends personally. Don't be that person. Don't be a brat. Don't be "pabebe". Everyone's got problems. Seeing you like that is very pathetic. Ugh. People, please, get a grip. Whatever. Keep your problems private online. Tell people personally. Shit.

I've been ranting here a lot lately. Not enough poems. lol. My decision to limit rantings on Twitter and Facebook is hard.

Friday, October 28, 2016

Just Repetition

Redundancy gets annoying. In my head, I go "I heard you the first time, okay?!". We get the message. You don't have to repeat it a bunch of times. Yeah, sometimes I forget, but I get irritated, man. Being repetitive makes me want to not do it or remember it. It makes me hate you. Good thing I'm a nice person. I won't hate you for being repetitive and annoying.

Just Started Typing This at 2:45 am

People rant a lot on social media. Some can not say words directly in front of people's faces. They can not be straightforward just to get their problems with that particular person over with. I'm getting sick of the drama. Even I rant out through the internet. But the long ones, I rant it out in this blog, which no one reads, therefore resulting to less irritated people. I used to write rants in notebooks, but it feels better when it is posted online because I get a hopeful feeling that someone might stumble upon it and read about my problems and that makes it feel better than writing it on a paper and hide it from the world, keeping it to myself, collecting all the horrible thoughts, leading them to be piled up until I break down and lose myself.

Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Just Wanted to Write a Speech, but One Sentence Seems Enough

Ever observed people around and wondered why they could have smiles on their faces, unknowing of what's going on with you?

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Just Checking

Everyday, I check my e-mail to see if someone left a comment. But it's the same everyday. No one leaves a comment. And that is kind of sad.

Why am I expecting this anyway? No one even reads my blog. lol

Saturday, October 15, 2016

Just a Positive Post for Once, well, Maybe Not Once

I kind of like how the
 semester is ending
 now, and how I haven't
suddenly disappeared
during finals and
the entire second semester,
kind of like what
happened last year, because
a somewhat-bipolar-like
disease wrapped me
like fried tacos. I love
fried tacos from Taco
Boy. I always buy
fried tacos when I
go to malls, if I have
the extra money of
course. I like typing
stuff like this now —
aligned left, not reaching
half the page. It seems
easier to the eyes, for
now, anyway.

I am now literally
typing what randomly
I think about. I hate
the word "literally". It
makes people sound
uneducated. Others misuse
the word and it makes
me cringe inside.

I am tired of pressing enter all the time now so I am just going to make
these lines longer because why not.

So this guy, I don't want to talk about this guy. I try not to think about this
guy, and dammit, I am already starting to talk about this guy, still am, and I am not liking a
single bit of it. This guy keeps on randomly popping up in my mind and
I don't know how he does it. Maybe he has these special powers that with a
snap of a finger, there he is, in my beautiful disastrous subconscious slowly
crawling towards my prefrontal cortex waiting to be written down in poems
or drawn in art to see how I interpret this particular guy, who I am not in
love with, but I do love deeply with my whole heart in a way how I should love myself.
And I don't want to freaking talk about this guy.

I forgot why I typed positive post for the title. I know there was one topic
that I want to blog about but I forgot. It's that guy's fault. Screw him. Anyways,
while I try to remember what it was I'll type more random thoughts here since
I drank two mugs of coke and it is an artificial poetic fuel. You know another poetic fuel?
Intense feelings. The best songs written ever are written while the poets are
experiencing intense feelings like love, anger, sadness, and others. I know that
some people don't think that love is a feeling, but just for the sake of my point,
please go with it. Intense feelings are a natural poetic fuel. It's better to wait when all your
thoughts flow out naturally like how it is with me right now rather than to force it
because it mostly will come out shitty when you force to write a poem or a song. On a
side note, I typed poetic fuel poem fuel until I corrected it now. I don't have to make
sense. It's my blog. You adjust. Not me. I will find the errors in my grammar and
spelling when I look back to my posts in the future.

Man, this post is getting long. Oh yeah, imagine chugging down 6 glasses of cocktails
at once, no breaks, mixed alcohols glass by glass with your classmate and teacher
watching. Yup. I did that, last Wednesday, during our preassessment for our bartending
class. Last Thursday between 2:30 am and 2:45 am, I puked them out. Not all of them,
because I don't see any cherry. lol. I swear, in this blog, I will never drink again.
Signed me below:













I really wonder why I was really boy-crazy last summer. I don't know what happened.
I normally am an emotionless little weird girl sitting in the corner staring at
nothing drowning in thoughts within my head. I had crushes on 3 boys, I recall,
but now, I realized that one of them is a dick, the other asshole, and the last one,
well, the crush just faded without any reason. Which is good, because I don't
like being like that. I like being my old weird banana self. It is true that girls really
fall for assholes and friend zone the nice guys.

Treated classmates some pizza last Sunday. Others didn't show up because they
got home late from another city from celebrating another classmate's birthday the
day before. I don't feel really bad from them not showing up though. It meant more
pizza for those who showed up and I to eat.

I don't think I'll remember what I was supposed to type here any time soon and this post is getting too long anyway so I'll just end this here.

Sunday, October 02, 2016

Just the 30-day Drawing/Design Challenge

Art vs. Artist: 30-day Drawing/Design Challenge Edition

30-day drawing/design challenge

I started the challenge last July 30 and finished it in the middle of August. My friend sent me the challenge through Messenger long before. I didn't think I would really start this challenge because I'm a lazy person. But I had nothing else to do by the end of July, because I don't have any on-the-job training yet and I quit doing this other thing that made me busy last year. So yeah, I decided to do the challenge.
30-day drawing/design challenge
Here are my drawings. Most of them aren't really that good but I still do hope that you like them :)

Day 1: A Self Portrait

Self portrait

medium: Watercolor on bond paper

Day 2: An Animal

animal sketch

medium: MS Paint

Day 3: A Childhood Memory

childhood memory sketch

Medium: Frixion pen on Monologue soft sketch book

Day 4: Friend, Family, or Significant Other

Friend, Family, or Significant Other

Medium: FC colored pencils on bond paper

This is my homie, Shiloh. She's really hard to draw, so I gave up. I planned to draw her with the style of realism. I couldn't draw the exact details. I wasn't really in the mood for realism and I was really feeling lazy so I didn't bother finishing it. Haha. Sorry, Shiloh.

Day 5: An Object in the Room

an object in the room sketch
Medium: MS Paint

Now I forgot I was supposed to do the challenge that day. I realized when it was already 11 pm so I made this in like 30 seconds because I did not really feel like drawing. This is supposed to be a mirror, by the way.

Day 6: A Literary Hero

celaena sardothien sketch

Medium: Mechanical Pencil on Bond Paper

This is my interpretation of Celaena Sardothien, from The Assassin's Blade.

Day 7: A Quick Gesture Drawing

quick gesture drawing

Medium: Ballpoint pen on sticky note paper

Day 8: A Super Hero

saitama drawing
Medium: Pencil on bond paper

Day 9: Classic Iconic Hollywod Scene or Image

titanic scene drawing
Medium: Ballpoint pen on bond paper

Day 10: Draw Dignity
banana drawing
Medium: Colored pens on bond paper

Yes, my dignity is a banana. Deal with it.

Day 11: A Typographic Quote
typographic quote

Medium: Marker and colored pencil on bond paper

Day 12: Favorite Article of Clothing or Outfit


lolita dress drawing



Medium: Uni-ball Signo white ink pen on Kraft Spazio notebook

Day 13: A Board Game Piece
scrabble tile drawing
Medium: Frixion pen on Monologue soft sketch book

Day 14: Unlikely Friends

angel and demon drawing
Medium: Colored pens on bond paper

Day 15: A Pattern
Mandala drawing
Medium: Colored pens on bond paper

Day 16: Your Losing Design on Project Runway
banana dress design
Medium: Ballpoint pen on bond paper

Day 17: A Minimalist Poster
Bates Motel Minimalist poster

Medium: Adobe Photoshop

Day 18: A Literary Villain
Frankenstein's monster drawing
Medium: Ballpoint pen and colored pencils on bond paper

Since Frankenstein is the first real book I ever read, I drew Frankenstein's monster.

Day 19: Muppet Themed
highlighter drawing
Medium: Highlighter on bond paper

Day 20: Retro Inspired
retro drawing

Medium: Colored pencils on bond paper

This is my OC named Janet Retro.

Day 21: A Clock

clock design
Medium: Uni-ball pen on bond paper

Day 22: Something Involving Water
lapiz lazuli drawing

Medium: Colored pencils on bond paper

This is Lapiz Lazuli from Steven Universe. She can control water, that's why I drew her for the draw something involving water challenge.

Day 23: Happiness

happiness drawing
Medium: Ballpoint pen on bond paper

This is supposed to form a question mark, since I really don't know what happiness is.

If you noticed the small letter R there, I can assure you that it does stand for something. I can leave you to guess what that is. Haha. HINT: R_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ (I might be lying though, lol)

Day 24: Your Favorite Food

taco sketch
Medium: Colored pens on bond paper

Day 25: Inanimate Object Come to Life
Adventure Time Little Dude
Medium: Ballpoint pen on bond paper

This is Little Dude from Adventure Time in the episode "Little Dude". He's Finn's hat that got magically turned alive by the Life Giving Magus.

Day 26: A Set of Kitchen Items
Kitchen Utensils drawing
Medium: Uni-ball pen on bond paper

Day 27: In the Style of Another Artist

colored pencil drawing

Medium: Colored pencils on bond paper

This isn't one of the characters from Adventure Time. It's an OC who's in the style of the artists of Adventure Time.

Day 28: Nature Inspired

nature painting
Medium: Textile paint, poster color paint, and acrylic on flour sack cloth

Day 29: Travel Poster
Travel poster philippines

Medium: Adobe Illustrator and Adobe Photoshop

Day 30: Draw Yourself Drawing

oil pastel drawing

Medium: Oil pastel on bond paper



So that's pretty much it. As you can notice most of my sketches are really sh*tty. That's because I got a little bit busy along the way so I just drew for the sake of completing the challenge. I didn't try that hard because as I keep saying in this blog, I am a lazy person. Haha. Thanks for viewing! :)

Friday, September 30, 2016

Just the Rap I just Composed

The problem with sleeping early is that you tend to wake up in the middle of the night 
leaving you to attempt to sleep again 
but can't because your thoughts are keeping you up.

Mom didn't understand so she sent me to a psychiatrist.
We talked about a lot of things
but the sure thing I talked to her about was about you
and how we stayed up late and how you tend to keep me up
But don't get me wrong I loved chatting really
it's just it didn't seem to be healthy
I'm sorry
but I guess I shouldn't be
because I loved every moment we had
it just has to end
we're getting nowhere
but to the realm of folly

I couldn't quite guess what was happening
My fingers kept dancing
I can't control 'em
maybe it's one of them seizures acting up again
All of the anxiety swallowing me up
I shouldn't let it control me but
it seems that I can't

So every time I see your face I just calm up
and your smile brightens my whole world
I just can't understand that

You used to say that we need each other
darling that's just not true
We tear each other apart
Now you suffer tremors my heart can't handle
and I cry every night because of that
I tried to prevent that from happening
But my words don't seem to get through your head
You weren't here with me anymore
You were there in your own world
I couldn't get in, I tried to
but the key you swallowed I couldn't get the locksmith
and now I lost you forever

My only friend I no longer have you. I apologize 'cause I couldn't save you. I couldn't make it on time. But I guess there's no one to blame.I couldn't handle any more of that. It might lead me to kill myself but I couldn't do that. I could never do that. Because if I did then there would be no one else to remember you.

Just Starting Something

I want to start composing songs. I already composed some songs in high school but those were academic ones and weren't real songs. They were really shitty. Not the songs that I wanted to write. Not even close to the genre I like. I want to make real songs, maybe rap, because raps are like alliterations and it feels good on the tongue and sounds awesome in the ears especially the messages raps commonly convey. Not that my favorite genre is rap. It's actually alternative rock, pop rock, and punk rock. So the raps I meant are not the Kanye West type of raps but the Eminem and Twenty One Pilots type of raps. I posted something in my Late Night Thoughts page on Facebook and maybe this could be a beginning of a rap. Here it is:


It kinda looks like a run on because of the lack of commas. Yeah. I want to make a real song and my first real song should be a rap. I'll play it on the ukulele so I could play it during Ukulele night with Kwatro Kwerdas.

Ohhh yeahh right Kwatro Kwerdas... I haven't blogged about it yet. It's a ukulele community in Davao City, where I live, and I started jamming with them last Sunday. I sang. It was the first time I sang in front of a real audience. I don't really sing because I'm an instrumentalist. I only usually play the guitar or the violin or the keyboard. But I loved it and the applause I had. We only jammed in a small coffee shop called Java Jive so the audience was a little small, but still, I had fun. The admin of the page was really cute. He's my sister's former classmate. I think he's gay. Not gay like people who likes the same sex kind of gay. Lol. Gay's just an expression.

Thursday, September 29, 2016

Just about my Future Post

I will be uploading my drawings for the 30-days drawing/design challenge. I started it on July and finished in August. I still haven't uploaded it yet because I'm too lazy. Haha. Some of them got lost but now I already scanned them. So just keep posted in here. :)

Monday, September 26, 2016

Just a Work in Progress

I actually started this a few days ago and until now it's still in progress. I don't know if I'll finish it soon. :)

Sunday, September 25, 2016

Just a Letter to a Wallflower

Dear Charlie,

It's been a long time since you've written now. You may really be busy participating in life. I really want to know how you are now. I wasn't able to respond to any of the letters you sent me before because you didn't leave any return address. I have no idea who you are, but you told me your stories and it really means a lot that you chose me to be the one to tell your story to.

It's been three years since I read your letters. I wasn't even born yet when you wrote them. You were 16. You must be 41 years old now. I'm only 18 now. But in a fortnight I will be 19. I read your letters when I was 16. If I change the timeline a little bit then we'd still be the same age now.

I really want to meet. Maybe you are not the same person that you've described yourself in your letters anymore. But still, I want to know you more. I still don't know how to send this to you but I wish you could read it. Your last letter did end up being the last letter. And I do believe that things are good with you. I just want to know how you, Sam, Patrick, your sister, your brother, your mom, and your dad are. I want to know if you are still thinking about your Aunt Helen, or if you got back into the hospital again. How was your sophomore year? Did you finish high school already? Are you going to college? I just want to know.

Right now I'm writing to you. 2:50 in the morning— a Sunday morning. If you were born a bit later you would have listened to the same songs I listen now. Because I like the songs that you listen to. I like The Smiths too, although they are not my favorite band. You said you wanted to be an author. I would really want to read one of your books. The way you write in your letters really gets me hooked. You say a lot of meaningful words, words that make a lot of sense, words that I could really relate to. You say the words that I want to say but can't because I don't know how to stitch them all up together. You seem to do that easily without even trying.

I would really like to write more in this letter to you but you don't exist and that hurts. I wish you were real. But enough of that. I really love you Charlie. I hope you know that.

Love always,

Lana

Saturday, September 24, 2016

Just Horoscopes

I
am
a
Libra.




I don't really believe in Horoscopes but this Twitter account all about them is a little accurate. I don't know why. I hope our Church leaders won't exploit me if I ever start to believe in them. Haha. But really though, just the first line it already knows me.